Saturday, November 2, 2019


What defines true friendship is the value of trust one has for the other. Friendship is all about having that mutual understanding of bearing one another's burden. But the moment a friend behaves like a fox then that value of trust would ever be no more. Be inspired by these inspiring words of motivation about friendship and when friends become foxes. It is in having an understanding of these behavioral patterns with friends that you would have the rightful knowledge in dealing with each situation when it arises.    

   
What Kind Of A Friend Are You?

A post I found on Facebook from one of cousins, gave me the inspiration to pen down this article. Friends! Friends!! Oh friends!!! How will the world be without friends? If you want to live without a friend then be ready to put down your life to `exit’ within the most possible time.

“A friend can either make or break you but be it as it may, you can never do without them.”

Life is all about friendship. We all need a friend, possibly friends, to make our life and world go round. Friends will make you laugh, friends will make you cry and even make you regret ever knowing them but inspite of all these, we all need a friend(s). Friendship brings togetherness and still in friendship, there togetherness grows. Like they say, united we stand, divided we fall. When we unite in friendship, we can accomplish more, but if we stand aside, then nothing can be achieved.

“Friendship in togetherness makes us achieve more.”

Togetherness is the key. It is the weapon that destroys disunity. Where the people unite in love with mutual trust and respect for one another, nothing and I mean no enemy can come around to destroy them. The bound of love, call it boundless love, it is what keeps friendship together. If you want to enjoy the essence of life, get along with true friends who keep your interest at heart. The joy of having true friends around you is like an unseen medication that heals the mind from every emotional sickness. If you want to make progress in life, never stand alone because no man is an island. Always remember that “No one makes progress except in the company of others”.

“It is the kind of friends you keep that will determine if you will fulfill your purpose.”

If your aim is to fly higher in life, then carry as much people along as you can because when you miss your track, it is the people you carry along that will help you get along with life and not to land on the bare ground where help might not be possible. Good as this advice maybe, do always have it at the back of your mind that friends at times if not always, are the ones that will bring about your downfall. Remember that he who knows you is the one who can easily harm you. No one knows you except a trusted friend who will secretly lead the way to your downfall.

“If you must trust any friend, keep it in mind the benefit of doubt.”

In overcoming this, learn to keep a part of your heart for betrayals. Again, remember that success can never come your way without betrayal from trusted friends. Sometimes, it is their betrayals that will propel the force of success to come your way. If a friend had disappointed you, bad as it may sound, learn to smile about it and put that behind you. Do not go in search of revenge. If you do, then, you have broken the law of love which is a product of friendship.

“Even in betrayal from a trusted friend, do not go in for revenge; leave that to nature to take it cause.”

Instead of channeling you energy seeking for revenge, I would rather say, channel it to something productive. If you seek to revenge, you can never have it the best way it should be. Leave such a friend to his/her conscience. Conscience is the best punisher. It has in it the sweet revenge which had been written; we called it the law of karma. Karma might be slow in actualizing it revenge but you know what, it gives time and when it finally comes, even the blind would know that this is the act of providence. Again, I would say to withstand this act of betrayals from friends,  always prepare your mind for the worst when dealing with anyone so that when the unforeseen happens, you will with an easy fortune; pick up the pieces of that occurrence of a broken heart and move on with life without looking back.

“It is the courage to give in moment of betrayals that makes you a matured person.”

Though sometimes you would not have all that you might need from friends but you can do yourself this favour, do not let your friend choose you, choose your friends. In choosing your friends, you need to check out both their physical and inner strengths. How! You might ask. Do a SWOT analysis I say. Check out their Strength, Weakness, Opportunity and Treat. If you can keep up with it, then go for it but if you find nothing in between the line, then like barbwire, keep off.

“If a friend has nothing to contribute to your life, there is no need keeping such as a friend.”   

Again, any friend that takes you away from the reality of life and makes pretending look like friendship; such a friend actually never worth the salt to be called your friend. Anyone you call your friend but cannot contribute positively to make you a better person in life nor share your dream and aspirations, my sincere advice to you is stay off and again, keeps off! Friendship is to make you strong and not to make you weak. It is to make you better than when they met you. When in friendship you do not find this, again I say, back-off.

“Anyone who is there for you when others kept off, that for sure is a true friend.”

A friend should make you better than when they meet you. The only way to get this done is not to go along with unserious kind of people if your dream is aiming high. Aiming high should be your altitude in life. And fulfilling this means you must surround yourself with the right kind of people. People who see beyond you, people who can look you straight into your face and tell you the truth when you are going astray and not the kind of friends who will praise-sing you even when they knew you are heading towards destruction. Like I said, if you want to stand tall and see beyond others, then you must stand among mighty men. In this case, it is the kind of friends you keep that will determine your achieving that greatness.

“True friends bring you to your greatness even when you seem not to see.”

Another thing I should let you know is that the kind of person you are will definitely show the kind of people you will ever attract around yourself as friends. Like they say, show me your friend and I will tell you who you are. You cannot determine the true character of anyone except when you meet them in the company of their peers. Remember, light begets light just as friends beget friends and too opposite line can never meet in a parallel direction. It is what you have that you can give, so is friendship. Like they say, “you cannot give what you do not have”. It is who and what you are, that the same kind of people will be attracted to you.

“Like birds of same feathers, so do friends of the same weather, flock together.” 

If you must be a friend, be the friend who can be trusted. You should give your all and never expect anything in return. When you give your all, your reward certainly will be sure if not now, but in the future. You may or may not benefit from it but your generation yet unborn will ever live to partake of it. It is good to be a good friend because a good friend is like a good name which is better than riches. A good friend is better than a bad brother. So strive in as much as you can in all you do to make an impact in the life of people that comes your way.

“If you learn to live for others, others will learn to live for you.”

Lastly, let your friends always have a good story to tell about you. And this story should be what will inspire others. Permit me to add here that if your friends are not doing this for you, never count such to be your true friend. So in choosing your friend(s), make such they come with inspiring qualities like what my cousin, Esther Daniel posted in her timeline which defines the true meaning of friends. FRIENDS: Forgive you. Respect you. Inspire you. Encourage you. Nourish you. Defend you. Support you.

If you found out that none of your friends have in them these qualities, I beg of you again, to keep off. And if you are a friend and you are not giving in to these definition of true friends as stated, then I beg to ask of you what kind of a friend are you?


When Friends Become Foxes

Who is a friend and who is a fox? If you may ask, I would rather say a friend is a trusted fox. In every life’s many lessons, you have those whom you call your trusted friends to learn its true nature which is either good or bad. Why would I call a friend a trusted fox if you may ask? Sincerely if you would look in-between the lines, there you will discover that those who seems to hurt us the more are the people we call our trusted friends.

“When a friend becomes a fox, it is born out of envy or lack of understanding the true nature of friendship.”

When setting out to make friends, have it at the back of your mind that it is very rare to escape the betrayals of friends when the time for it arises. Naturally, making friends shouldn’t be a problem but you have to choose who you should count as your true friend(s). A trusted friend you should know can become a trusted fox at anytime. What makes a friend become a trusted fox is sometimes born out of some natural tendencies. You should be aware that friends are naturally jealous and sometimes their jealousy is what leads to envy which eventually becomes the weapon they would use in blackmailing you. The fault that leads to all these could either come from both parties. Innocently you might give out information to friends without knowing that in time of backstabbing, this information of yours are what would be used in trying to bring you down. When you have friends, it is not all about you that should be made known to them. When all of you are known then it is easier for you to be made a victim of your own doing.

When seeking out to make friends, try and discover who your real friends are. Sincerely, it is not everybody that should be made your true friend(s). When you make everybody your friend, then you opened up yourself to so many things that might not give you the advantages to maximize your full potentials. If you have a friend that cannot contribute positively towards the actualization of your dream, then such is not fit to be called your friend. The true nature of friendship was meant to be for companionship. And if you are not finding that companionship in your friend(s), then it is as good as quitting before that friend becomes your fox.

Friendship is actually not by force. It is what should bring joy and gladness to your life. It should be what will make you feel awesome to know that you have someone who is truly indeed a friend and not those who will give you many reasons to regret ever coming in contact with such people and of all made them your friend. In as much as you will come across friends that might later on become fox; sincerely if the truth must be told then you would realize that you might not live to actualize your dreams if you have no friends. And sometimes it is this foxes in the image of friend(s) that would even help you reach your full potentials in life. Be it as it make, you need to guide your heart and follow your instinct when seeking out for those to make your trusted friend.  

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