Here is a write-up on one mistake you made in your marriage that you don't want others to make in their marriages.
Marriage, often described as a sacred union between two souls, encapsulates a journey replete with moments of joy, trials, and profound growth. Having traversed the varied landscapes of matrimony myself, I recognize the intricate interplay of love and challenges that define this sacred bond. Today, I stand before you not only as a narrator but as a humble sharer of personal experiences. Within the tapestry of my own marital journey lies a poignant tale—a tale of a mistake, a misstep that I made, and one that I ardently wish others can learn from and circumvent.
In the depths of every relationship, lies the potential for missteps and errors. My story serves as a poignant reminder that even within the sanctity of marriage, imperfection prevails. As I recount my own misstep, I do so with the hope that my vulnerability will illuminate the path for others, offering guidance and wisdom garnered from personal experience. Through introspection and humility, we can transform our mistakes into opportunities for growth and enlightenment, fortifying the foundations of our unions and fostering deeper connections with our partners.
The journey of marriage is a nuanced one, characterized by a continuous interplay of love, understanding, and forgiveness. By sharing my story, I invite you to embark on a journey of self-reflection, to confront the complexities of human relationships with candor and courage. Together, let us traverse the highs and lows of matrimony, drawing strength from our shared experiences and forging bonds of empathy and resilience. Through open dialogue and a willingness to learn from our mistakes, we can navigate the intricate terrain of marriage with grace and wisdom, emerging stronger and more united than before.
One Mistake You Made in Marriage that You Don't Want Others to Make in Their Marriages
Reflecting on a personal misstep in marriage, I implore others to heed the lessons learned to avoid similar pitfalls. In sharing this tale, I highlight the importance of communication and empathy in sustaining marital harmony. The mistake serves as a cautionary tale, urging couples to prioritize understanding and compromise, fostering mutual respect and trust. By acknowledging our fallibility and learning from past errors, we fortify the foundations of our unions and cultivate deeper connections with our partners. Let this shared experience guide us towards a path of greater understanding and resilience, ensuring that our marriages thrive amidst life's challenges.
The Foundation of Love
When I think back to the early days of my marriage, I am flooded with memories of love, excitement, and anticipation. It felt like we were on top of the world, ready to conquer anything together. But little did I realize that even the strongest love needs a solid foundation to stand the test of time.
Mistake #1: Taking Each Other for Granted
In the bliss of those initial days, it was easy to assume that our love would always be enough. As time went on, however, I started to take my partner for granted. The little things they did for me, the efforts they put into the relationship – all began to fade into the background as life's demands took center stage.
Lesson Learned: Never underestimate the importance of expressing gratitude and appreciation. Those small gestures go a long way in keeping the flame of love alive.
Communication: The Heartbeat of Marriage
A crucial aspect of any successful marriage is communication. Open and honest dialogue fosters understanding and helps address any misunderstandings before they become deep-rooted problems.
Mistake #2: Letting Communication Break Down
As life got busier, we found ourselves talking less and assuming more. This communication breakdown led to misunderstandings and eventually created a rift between us. It wasn't long before we were facing a wall of silence.
Lesson Learned: Keep the lines of communication open. Regularly check in with each other, share your thoughts and feelings, and listen actively. A simple conversation can prevent major issues from festering.
Balancing Act: Me, You, and Us
Finding the right balance between personal pursuits, the relationship, and individual identity is a delicate dance that every couple must master.
Mistake #3: Neglecting Individual Identities
In my eagerness to strengthen our bond, I inadvertently neglected our individual identities. Our hobbies, interests, and personal growth took a backseat as we focused solely on our roles as spouses.
Lesson Learned: Encourage and support each other's personal growth. Embrace the things that make you unique and remember that a healthy marriage thrives when both partners continue to flourish as individuals.
Weathering the Storms Together
Life's challenges are inevitable, and a marriage often faces its share of storms. How you weather these challenges together can define the strength of your relationship.
Mistake #4: Facing Challenges Individually
During a particularly difficult time, I made the mistake of trying to tackle our challenges on my own. I believed that shielding my partner from the stress would protect our relationship, but it only created distance between us.
Lesson Learned: Face challenges as a united front. Lean on each other for support, share your burdens, and work together to find solutions. The process of overcoming difficulties can actually bring you closer.
The Power of Compromise
Marriage brings together two unique individuals, each with their own set of values, beliefs, and preferences. Learning to navigate these differences is a key aspect of marital growth.
Mistake #5: Resisting Compromise
In the heat of disagreements, I found myself resisting compromise. I held onto my perspective tightly, convinced that I was right. This rigid stance only fueled arguments and hindered resolution.
Lesson Learned: Embrace the art of compromise. Understand that your partner's viewpoint is equally valid, and finding common ground often leads to solutions that benefit both of you.
Time: The Precious Gift
Amidst the hustle and bustle of modern life, finding quality time to spend together can be challenging. Yet, this investment of time is what keeps the connection alive.
Mistake #6: Neglecting Quality Time
As responsibilities piled up, quality time took a backseat. We became engrossed in our routines, forgetting to nurture the bond that brought us together.
Lesson Learned: Prioritize quality time. Whether it's a weekly date night or simply enjoying a quiet evening together, these moments reinforce the foundation of your relationship.
Embracing Change
Change is inevitable, both individually and as a couple. Embracing change and growing together can lead to a fulfilling and evolving partnership.
Mistake #7: Fearing Change
In my pursuit of stability, I shied away from embracing change. I clung to the past and resisted the natural evolution of our relationship.
Lesson Learned: Embrace change as a chance for growth. Allow your relationship to evolve naturally and welcome new phases with open arms. Adapting together strengthens your connection.
Marriage is a journey of continuous learning, growth, and love. My personal mistake of taking my partner for granted and neglecting important aspects of our relationship served as a valuable lesson. I hope that by sharing my story and the lessons I've learned, you can avoid these pitfalls and nurture a thriving and lasting marriage. Remember, it's the small, consistent efforts that lay the foundation for a love that stands the test of time.
Here are shared random Facebook reactions by individuals based on one mistake you made in your marriage that you don't want others to make in their marriages.
Ikede Oreva
These apply to both gender.
1: always set boundaries, do not tolerate disrespect in any form.
2: be nice but do not be too close to your in-laws.
3: avoid running to your family In times of crises. They will most likely support their own(you) even though you’re clearly wrong.
4: keep your circle clean and small. Evil communication corrupts good manners.
5: keep communication lines open no matter what.
Adedayo Olubukola Kush
No matter how submissive u want to be, try ND av a touch of madness
*. Don't always tolerate everything!!
* Put ur inlaws in their place, don't pamper less ND dnt over pamper anyone
* Don't fake anything, if they r for u they will respect u ND accept regardless of ur flaws
Oshatimehin Josephine Adeola
Don't prove too much of a wife material
Let him carry his responsibilities
When your in-laws begin to show some red flag, know your place and withdraw. You can't force an enemy to love you
Ogwuike Ogechukwu Amara
Dropping my education for marriage
NEVER accept their promises
Adaobi Chiamaka
You see getting married to abroad based man is not a marriage avoid it especially the ones that will marry you and dump you here in Nigeria and travel back to abroad.
Oke Rone Treasure
Never allow anyone to stay in your huz when u are newly married especially ur in-laws.
Evans Chinaza
Trying to manage any money he gives u without complaining because u believe he doesn't have and be using ur own to complete it, when the money comes u wouldn't know because he will keep giving u same. Secondary do not be too submissive they will take u for granted
Nene George
Opening the door of my home and allowing my in-laws to come live with us. They got so comfortable, felt entitled and started misbehaving. My kindness brought me so much hate. I had the worst terrible in-laws, I don’t pray for such on anyone.
Jane Nwogu
Try to have something doing, before considering marriage .even if the man promise to set you up just to get your attention, no gree ooo.he should do that before you both are married else them go carry shit rub you for face.and you will cry premium tears.
Lastly never let go of a life, opportunity because of marriage.
Don't ever marry ,a man that lives in his family compound.
Lastly try get small touch of skioskio for head to aviod see finish.
Tricia Jalmet Dayong
Taking up the home responsibilities as a woman
Hèlèn Jonàs
I haven’t make any mistake though and by God’s grace I won’t but my candid advice is, don’t listen to what people say, I mean your married friends may advise you base on the fact that they got married before you so they might feel they know better than you, don’t you dare use what they said to handle your own home cause your husband/marriage is different from theirs.
Cyn Thia
Don't end ur career cuz of a man,if he's bittered about u working then let him go and hug transformer
Don't tell ur partner everything about ur family,the secrets,the shameful stories etc,they'll use it to later mock u in the long run
Check ur partners phone
Don't start what u can't finish cuz u want to be seen as wife material
Viliean Innocent
Be careful with the way you treat your spouse because someday you will be at the mercy of your spouse. No one knows tomorrow
Ekeigwe Chisom Udochi
Caring for ur mother inlaw more than ur mother because she will never appreciate it
Onoharigho Caroline
Letting your man to know your Acct balance,it may lead to borrowing without repayment
Komeh Edward
If you don't like something, you say it immediately,
Elohor Sagay
Too much closeness with ur in-laws , as a wife know ur place and don't over estimate urself because A time will come when they will remind u that u are an outsider.
Akinremi Temidayo Bukettie
Never discuss your past with your partner
He will definitely use it against you
Let your past remains in the past
Frederick Ukor
When you don't define boundaries, and allow people access to everything in your house. Giving too much freedom to in-laws and your own family members, to make it worse you are too friendly with them!
Gradually, they begin to take things for granted and start to disrespect you!
I now know why our fathers were VERY STRICT LIKE LION WHILE AT HOME.
WITHOUT AUTHORITY, THERE WILL NEVER BE ABSOLUTE RESPECT!
Even your partner can take you for granted if you allow too much freedom. Learn to stamp your AUTHORITY most times!
Apart from your wife and children, don't be TOO FRIENDLY WITH IN-LAWS and family members!
Ozorji Chika
Never inform your wife that you love her sooo much, that's the worst thing I did, tx
Sabina Eberechi
Marrying a man who lives with his parents, family house.
Not having any handwork before entering into marriage
Bambi Bliss
Relating with co-wives too closely n sacrificing so much for nothing
Pesyl Chinonye Okafor Chinedu
The wife love should not be more than that of the man, even the bible said it, husband loves ur wife as christ loves the church
Taiwo Diya
Dont Marry cos,of what people will say,know your woman well and don’t endure what you won’t take for ever.
Omolade Adegbite Badru
Too much of tolerance, too quite, I don't complain too much, I over look his mistakes , I accepted alot of shit from him, I was too submissive and lots more nonsense and he really took them for granted but thanks to God I am out of the marriage now.
Idongesit Mfrimo Uyoenang
Have a touch of madness
Josphine Ukaegbu
Please try to have something doing before you enter marriage no matter how small e get why 😏
Olatunji Adeola
Living with husband family causes a lot of problems
Juliet Colors
I no dey share anything,make everybody make their own mistakes jare😏
Esther Petex
Gisting too much with small sister in-law, it bring so much disrespectful
Mhiz Naana
Gisting too much with Sister-in-laws
Ademola Morenikeji
Always luv u self first as a woman please
Frederick Ukor
Allowing anyone from both my wife side and my side to stay with us.
Not defining boundaries....too much freedom to in-laws.
Obajemu Blessing Ajoke
Too much love and submission
Delia Sinclair-smith
Stand up 4 yrself
Draw a line from Monday what u will not take on Sunday.
Have boundaries.
Ugonna Juliet
Too much expectations from your in-laws or even your own husband. Pray to have something doing so that depression won't come near you.
Queen B Ble
I did not verify before marrying him 🙆 investigation
Lizzy Tony
Taking up responsibilities in trying to be a help mate n d man now seeing it as ur responsibility. D worst is not being appreciated for them. In my next life, if there's one, if d man dey cry say him no get money, I go dey roll for ground say I never see shishi for my life b4.
Michael Ebere Esther
Am learning alot in this group 💯,,,, God bless all the admin 🙌
Ibinabo Thompson Silas
Don't marry him cux is a pastor. That doesn't guarantee a good man or home . Mistake of my life with maximum regrets till date.
Esther Obiageri
Don't let your spouse Know that you love your ex so much before separation
Nelson Maurice
Victoria Ayisi definitely some love their ex more than the present... its happened but the love will build as a they continue staying together...a Lady has such an experience before and was able to overcome it
Vivian Kelly
Going into marriage without courtship and proper investigation about the family pattern. Especially to know if na the type that regards and value woman very important.
Kadiri Hadiza Amsobless Osamojie
Self love Sha day important
Secondly get watin u day do oh.. E get why
Thirdly share less listen more
Then avoid some kind friends oh.. E still get y
Mizn Martha Vera
Try and make ur own money
So that u can earn ur respect from ur husband if not ur name nah sorry.
And never u quit ur job, because ur husband ask u to do so
If not u will never forgive urself at the end
Pierra Makena
Ave done none ,but for advise, be carefull of anyone who tells you stories against the rest family members( inlaws), he/she may end up twisting the story they told you as if it's you who did it.
Bright Chinedu
Don't marry because of pity, don't marry because your age mate are getting married,
Ayabonga Amampondo Tshona
Marry with your head not your heart darling 💔💔
Augustina G Udoh
Pls know the person you want to marry very well ooo cos hmmm and pls neva marry a man wit kids even if na half.
Nnodim Queeneth Chinenye
Allowing sister in-law who doesn't like u from the very first day she set her eyes on you to stay with you ..... They will make u regret ever agreeing to marry into their family
Uzoamaka Ogbodo
Don't lie to partner, don't share your bad past to hubby ooo don't discuss your family backgrounds to hubby etc
Benjamin Chuks
The mistake is the name marriage itself 🤔
By now my baby mamas for don reach 100 😔
So my brother if you never marry Abeg no do that nonesense ooo🙄
I don't want peace, I want vawulence always 🚶🤸🧑🦯
Akukwu Blessing Bliss
Benjamin Chuks person will just sit at his house with wife and children enjoying and come here and be giving bad advice 😩pity us wey still dey find hus and band nah
Ramot Usman
Make sure as a woman u have something doing it very important
Nazath Anita Chinazo
i think telling my family secrets is the worse mistake i have ever made😭😭 it hurt when u use that against me
Ajieh Juliet Ebele
Using or adding your money to make thing happened in the house, cos the day you do not do it, he will turn against you, always make use of any amount he brings, food sweet or not everybody eat it like that
Moudlyne Gold
Showing too much love to my in laws especially the ladies
Subehru Funmilayo
Let ur husband love you more than u do
Orisunmade Yetunde Idera
Pray very well before embarking on the journey, i lost my husband few weeks ago which God has shown me from the begining but because he was my spec, he was actually a peaceful person but when something is not for you, it will never be for you
Humble Onyi Eke
Top contributor
Accepting to eat Agbu gbu na Achicha (fio fio)🤔🤔🤔
Bakare Aderonke
Allowing in-laws to stay with us. E no fit happen again sha, after all the shege wey my eyes don see.
Nneka Genevieve
Know exactly when to display small maddness and when to be calm, if you are always quiet and calm just to avoid trouble , you will be taken for granted and if you are always aggressive , na trouble be that.
Kehinde Soneye
Dont start what your strength won't take in marriage. Your yes is yes and your no is no. Period. Don't allow your hubby to travel out of the country and leave you and kids at home. I have my reasons. BE WISE
Achara Ugo
No enter with empty hands
As you are packing your bags don't forget to pack crase alongside incase if there's need for it.
Rita Kyenpiya Dasan
Never u pity n support a man, never lay ur life to make him comfortable while he relax..
Joyce Isudu Edokpa
Don't go and see any co wife as ur sister, u will get disappointed. Urs maybe different anyway but be careful.
Nancy Chidinma
We have made our mistakes ,others should make theirs too, l no d share any mistake 🤪🤪
Osagie Chinecherem Precious
What works for me may not work for you. Live your lives and do what works for you. Make a mistake and learn from your mistakes. 🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♀️
Joy Anyanwu
Don't let fear take over u, be urself be bold .
don't let fear take the best part of u all because u want to be a good wife material to ur inlaws.
Amara Obinwa
We learn from our mistakes, it makes us stronger and smarter.
Personally I treat people the exact way they treat me.
I really don’t know how to pretend
Either through my actions or vocal shikena 🤷♀️
Nelson Maurice
Being too over caring for the family, as if nothing can be done without u...
Adakole Onyi Blessing
Allowing family members stay with u is a big problem
Iz Odigie
Just get small crazy for your body you nor go get problem e get why
Precious Omonade
Don't over look his or her mistakes bcos u want peace, u will be taken for granted
Priscilla Glory
Forming submissions and I don't care attitude to adulterous husband gave me STD that lead to my blocked fallopian tube and my journey with infertility.
I should have walked away. Now I'm battling against the odds
Omorilewa Temilola
Set boundaries, dnt b too close to Ur in-laws, and dnt go n b doin "good wife" ..b urslf. Dem go show u shege promax 🤣🤣
Zian Chi
Joint businesses and joint accounts. It might work for others, but it didn't work for me. So much of arguments and distrusts when it comes to money . Decision making is cumbersome. You will work like a jackie and come home to explain to no avail how much you spent on operations, workers, petrol, mechanic etc. Planning for investment was so troublesome. You can't even help a relation or a friend with little money without getting queried.🙄 Yet you are the one operating the businesses, and she manages funds and spend at will and slam it on upkeep and children. Now I do my businesses and she does hers, case closed. 😊
Esther Okuro
As a woman don't carry too much responsibilities on your head
Cynthia Hycent
over reaction to my husband, is true he has hot temper i over react to make things worst, from my actions my family will interfere, my inlaw will also interfere from there thing became worst, but now God have taken over
Ganiat Adeola Ajetunmobi
Get 2 knw each other very well, if ur partner don't lov u don't go 2 alter with him or her
Nkechi Vincent
Haveing something legit you are doing before going into marriage
Eunice Johnbull
Leaving with inlaws is a no no,even if it is one room go and rent.
Make sure you check the siblings very important
How they were raised matters alot,don't ignore
Conclusion
My shared experience of a marital mistake underscores the significance of learning from our missteps to nurture healthier unions. By prioritizing effective communication, empathy, and compromise, couples can fortify their bonds and navigate challenges with grace. Let us embrace humility and vulnerability as we strive to cultivate deeper connections with our partners, drawing wisdom from our shared experiences. May this lesson serve as a guiding light, empowering others to cherish and safeguard the sanctity of their marriages, ensuring that love and understanding prevail over obstacles, and enriching the journey of matrimony for years to come.
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